Monthly Archives: April 2011

My Tribute to an Amazing Man – John D. Rastelli Jr.

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I just got back to my office after lunch and was greeted by very sad news. One of my first hockey coaches when I started playing competitive hockey passed away last night after a long battle with Cancer. Mr. John D. Rastelli Jr, or Coach Rastelli as we all called him, was an amazing man, who taught me so much about so many things, on and off the ice. (His obituary is located here http://bit.ly/if2Xjm)

For those of you that don’t know, I played hockey for 11 years, starting when I was seven and ending when I graduated at the age of 18. Coach Rastelli was my coach for seventh and eighth grade, so when I was 13 and 14. However, he continued to coach the middle school team I played for when I was in High School, so I continued to see him after that. Coach Rastelli always was able to put a smile on my face, he just had that kind of personality that lit up a room when you saw him, and was always smiling, unless he caught you not working hard and then there was hell to pay. Prior to my seventh grade year, I played hockey at an in house level, but  started traveling with my team and playing for two teams that year. He always wanted us to get better.

I can’t tell you how many things I learned from Coach Rastelli. I learned the value of hard work. We spent most of our practices with him just working on skating. I can’t tell you how many times we did full circles, Russian circles, and east to west drills with him. We didn’t even get pucks until more than halfway through practice. However, because he taught me to work on the basics, I became a very strong skater. He also gave me one of my first experiences in leadership, naming me captain of my team, a title that he felt I earned and deserved.

I remember when he first told us he had Cancer, and he was really the first person I ever knew that had it, and seeing him struggle through the disease was hard on all of us as a team. He ended up having to take a step back when he was undergoing treatment, but it was always a joy when he was able to make it out to a game or practice. He coined the phrase “It’s not just Hockey, its Clearview Hockey”, which we didn’t quite understand, but he loved to remind us of it at all times. When I was back in my hometown in March, I went to my home rink and the banner with that phrase on it is still up there, many years after I last touched the ice there.

I hadn’t spoken to Coach Rastelli in many years, but I thought of him often. I didn’t even really realize that he was sick again. It was quite a shock when I saw the obituary posted on my former teammates walls. I didn’t know what to do (I still don’t, as I have broken down a few times while writing this post). I didn’t really think it would affect me this much, but it has and it is.

Its amazing how much you don’t realize people teach and touch you until they are gone. We all have those people in our lives, the ones that if you really think back, made a huge impact on who you are and what you have become. Whether it is a teacher, a coach, a pastor, or anyone really, they helped us during our formative years, and the lessons they gave us still are used today. Don’t forget those people in your lives, and also don’t forget that you may be that person to others. I don’t know if Coach Rastelli ever realized how much he taught me, and I don’t think I ever took the opporunity to tell him. All I can hope now is that at some point, I am able to pass those messages on to others, and his memory and legacy lives on.

Rest in Peace Coach Rastelli. Thank you for all that you did and for showing us how to be better men.

A Perfect Warm Weather Playlist (According to Tom Fritz)

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This will be my first completely non-student affairs post, and I am pretty excited to write it.

I am a music buff. I love music. All types, artists, tempos, bands, solos, you name it, I probably have at least heard of it. I have a few bands that I consider my favorites, but I tend to change my music listening habits according to the seasons. In Texas, it is getting quite warm, so I am breaking out my warmer weather music, and thought it may be worth sharing, so here it goes.

1. Say Hey (I Love You) – Michael Franti and Spearhead: You may recognize this from commercials and movies, but it is a great song for a sunny day driving around with your windows down.

2. Cheeseburger in Paradise - Jimmy Buffett: I am a HUGE Parrothead. I have seen him 10 times, and will see him again next month. It takes me back to being on vacation with my family, and there was always Buffett playing in all rooms of the house. This one most people have probably heard of, but still a classic.

3. How Forever Feels – Kenny Chesney: There are going to be a few Kenny songs. I am convinced that when Jimmy Buffett retires (whenever that happens), Kenny Chesney will take over the beach rock genre. The lyrics on this are made for enjoying with toes in the sand.

4. Bubble Toes - Jack Johnson: The chorus will get stuck in your head for hours. I also recommend this as a song to scream at the top of your lungs while driving to relieve stress. Try staying in a bad mood after that, I dare you.

5. Summertime – DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince: Before he was the movie star, Will Smith created this song that should be the summertime anthem for anyone that remembers new episodes of the show.

6. Island in the Sun – Weezer: The basic guitar line on this lends itself to toe tapping. Rivers’ voice is just soothing to listen to.

7. All Mixed Up – 311: When I got my driver’s license, this was the first song I listened to on my first solo ride. Always takes me back to the summer I turned 17 and that first  trip to the CVS to pick up stuff for my mom.

8. Scar Tissue – Red Hot Chili Peppers: One of my favorite songs of all time. One of those songs that makes you want to put your hand out the window and make waves with it.

9. Cherub Rock – Smashing Pumpkins: Play this as loud as possible and do not be afraid to play air guitar. In fact, it is recommended.

10. Interstate Love Song – Stone Temple Pilots: Another one of my favorite songs of all time. When the intro ends and the riff comes in, and that moment of silence right before that, there is no way to keep my head from banging a bit.

11. What I Got – Sublime: The Sublime 20th Century Master’s CD could be the only CD I listen to between May and September every year.

12. Margaritaville – Jimmy Buffett: No explanation necessary. I recommend a live version (with the Lost Verse included if you are a true fan)

13. Young – Kenny Chesney: Takes you back to whenever you defined yourself as “Younger”, because I don’t think I will ever be able to describe myself as “old”.

14. Dixieland Delight – Alabama: This is a new band that has worked its way onto my playlists. This song makes me want to go get lost on back roads, and makes me wish I had a pick-up truck.

15. Could You Be Loved – Bob Marley: What is a warm weather playlist without some Bob?

16. Lights – Journey: Go ahead, say that Don’t Stop Believin’ should be on here. I will take Lights any day. Steve Perry’s voice mixes perfectly with the sound of breaking waves and wind.

17. Wish You Were Here - Incubus: I could have picked any Incubus song, but this happens to be the one I remember the first summer my older cousin got a car, and we would go driving around listening to this, thinking we were really cool.

18. Fire – Jimi Hendrix: The only thing wrong with this song is that it is only 2 minutes and 44 seconds.

19. Maggie May – Rod Stewart: Rod Stewart has lots of songs that could qualify. I think one of the ending scenes in Lords of Dogtown with Heath Ledger sealed this song as one of my favorite summer songs.

20. Where the Streets Have No Name – U2: I have been to the city in Nicaragua that this song is based off of. Edge’s opening notes can still give me chills.

21. Chicken Fried – Zac Brown Band: Great for group sing-a-longs. Add friends, a few beers, and its instant magic.

22. Oye Como Va – Santana: Just screams outdoor speakers and some salsa dancing. I don’t speak enough Spanish to understand what it means, but I do love the song.

I believe all of these songs are available on iTunes, so if you need some sunshine in your veins, try these on for size.

What songs would you add? Which ones do you agree with? Disagree with? If you make your own list on your blog, post the link in the comments section.

You want to conceal and carry what on campus?

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For those of you that don’t know, I am currently employed by Texas A&M University, which is, of course, in Texas. What some of you may not know is that Texas is one of a few states that is currently looking at a law allowing residents to carry concealed weapons, including handguns. It is being debated in the legislature as we speak. This will potentially mean that all residents over the age of 21 are eligible to go through a background check, qualify on a range, and go through a safety course which concludes with their ability to carry a weapon in college buildings. This is different from the current law, which allows students to carry them on the campus but not indoors. The new law would prevent them from being carried in bars and at sporting events (at least in its current iteration). There has been some interest in addressing the issue of guns being stored in residence hall rooms, but the final details of the bill are still being worked on.

A lot of people are talking about the safety of our students and what happens if there is an active shooter situation, in which the emergency responders are looking for anyone not in a uniform with a weapon. I understand all of these points, but for this post, I want to focus in a different direction. I want to talk about teaching civility, education, and discourse in a land where students carry guns.

First off, I am not the type of person who believes that if this bill passes, students are going to start shooting them into the air to celebrate getting an A on a test or resolve roommate conflicts by shooting one another in the foot. I do, however, think that adding a weapon into an equation changes the dynamic of a lot of things. For instance, do you think that the same level of disagreement will happen over one roommate being a night owl and the other being an early riser if one roommate has a gun on the desk? Violence isn’t inevitable, but can act as a deterrent to certain disagreements. What about heated issues in a classroom? Will those be able to happen with the hidden wonder if a student is armed? I would hope so, but am not positive.

The other thing that is worth considering is what about our student staff that has to confront situations? I am thinking about my RA staff, when they are on duty, they are often asked to address situations of alcohol, noise, or general shenanigans that occur in the building. How do we support them if they are walking into a room that may or may not have armed and drunk residents in it? Do we have police come in for all confrontations now, or do we train and arm the RA’s?

Overall, I think my main concern with this bill is the number of questions it leaves un-answered and the challenges it presents to student affairs administrators in writing policy and doing our job in an environment with armed students. Maybe we should be taking some extra time and exploring these questions before we jump in and try to learn on the fly, because in my opinion, trying to figure it out when the cost of a mistake is a student life is not worth it. If we do explore and come back to the same law, then at least we have taken the time to figure it out.

I would love to get some discourse going on this topic in the comments section. What are your opinions on the topic, and how do you think student affairs divisions should be responding to this?

It is My Honor…

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Last night I had the honor of participating in one of the most amazing campus traditions I have ever seen, heard of, or been a part of. At Texas A&M, on the first Tuesday of every month, when an Aggie student has passed away in the previous month, an event called Silver Taps is held. (If you are not familiar, please check out this site) My hall is one of the older ones on campus, and typically has a very strong showing for this event. I have not attended all of them, but I was able to go last night.

About halfway through the ceremony, I had a feeling overwhelm me. I wasn’t sure what it was at first, I thought initially it was sadness at the loss of an Aggie, but that wasn’t quite it. When the ceremony ended, I went back to my apartment, and I figured out what it was; it was honor.

I have no degrees from Texas A&M, I never lived in Texas before moving here last June, and I have been a professional here for a little over 9 months. However, because of my status as a staff member at Texas A&M, I am invited to be a part of this community and participate in it as if I was a ring-wearing member. The students at Silver Taps didn’t look around and wonder who this guy was or why I was there. They accepted me in as a member of my community, and all I had to do was want to be a member of the community.

Being  in this field puts us in a different position; we often are working at institutions that you have no paper connection to outside of the name on your paycheck, no degrees, no grades, no transcripts. I love my Quinnipiac Bobcats and Florida State Seminoles, and they will always be the places where I got my degrees, and that will never change. But it is my honor to be a part of this community right now, and my students have seen that honor, and have welcomed me with open arms.

If you think about it, it is one of the coolest things about our jobs. We get to be accepted into a community by the main keepers of that community and spirit; the students. We get to help those students uphold (and sometimes, create) those traditions, and through that, those traditions will become a part of you, if you let them. Ask them what they love about their institution. Ask them why they came here in the first place. Ask them what time of year is their favorite. Ask them what they tell others about when they ask about their school. Just ask them something, it will show you are interested and wanting to be a part of something that will always be attached to their identity.

Sometimes, when my job is stressing me out, and my to-do list is several pages long, I need to remember that doing this job is an honor. I get to impact students’ lives, and be a part of their community at the same time. There is nothing better than that.

How are you encouraging new professionals at your institution to be a part of the community and culture?